By Wil Forbis

You want archives motherfucker? Check this shiz-nit out:
September 2003
August 2003
July 2003
June 2003
April 2003
March 2003
Feb 2003
Jan 2003
Dec 2002
Nov 2002
Oct 2002
Sept 2002
Aug 2002
July 2002
June 2002
May 2002
April 2002
March 2002
Feb 2002
Jan 2002
Dec 2001
Nov 2001
Oct 2001
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Aug 2001
July 2001
June 2001
May 2001
April 2001
March 2001
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Dec 2000
Nov 2000
Oct 2000
Sept 2000

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Thursday, February 27, 2003
Only the good die old (and feeble... and covered with weird spots.)

So long, Mr. Rogers. You a playa, dawg!

posted by wil forbis 2/27/2003 09:18:00 PM

Tuesday, February 25, 2003
Jesss, are you sure this whole deal with this departing physicist boyfriend is for real? Sounds a bit like a FRIENDS episode.
posted by wil forbis 2/25/2003 11:49:34 PM

Paul Stanley of KISS on pyrotechnics: "...You have to be extremely careful with anything that has to do with fire."

Thanks Paul.
posted by wil forbis 2/25/2003 11:47:09 PM

Well I'll be damned. Go here and you'll see that Luke Ford has quoted my comments about the public speaking abilities of certain bloggers at the recent ACF event. (See the 2/23 post down yonder.) Included are several responses to my statements. Someone even called me "petty and mean."


But in the interest of fairness, I thought I would cast my critical eye inwards, and relate some of my own personal deficiencies. They are listed as follows.


Well sometimes I...


Darn it! I'm coming up empty!

posted by wil forbis 2/25/2003 04:31:51 PM

Monday, February 24, 2003
A few hours ago, I happened to catch part of the interview Larry King did with
the woman who was sexually assaulted at age 13 by filmmaker, Roman Polanski. Her
message was "judge the art, not the artist," and she didn't want what had happened
to her affect how people viewed Polanski's new holocaust drama, "The Pianist." It's
an issue that has always fascinated me: great artists who are also moral disasters.
There's no doubt while looking over Polanski's work that he's a skilled director. "Rosemary's
Baby" was a haunting masterpiece. "Chinatown" defined modern cinematic
storytelling. And I think this new film could be his magnum opus, shedding light
deeper into the human condition than we've ever seen.

I think there's a parallel in another story currently in the news: The
Rhode Island fire where almost a hundred people were killed by the negligence
of 80's rock band, Great White. Of course you want to condemn them. But who
can deny the artistic mastery in such songs as "Rock Me," "Stick It," or "Mista
Bone." It was music that defined a generation and I only hope when we look back,
we can see past the deaths of a hundred nobodies to the songs that will live

posted by wil forbis 2/24/2003 10:23:07 PM

Interesting look at the sex lives of bed-bugs here.

I typed "" when I meant to type "" Is it a subliminal reaction to the google buyout of blogger?
posted by wil forbis 2/24/2003 06:48:37 PM

Sunday, February 23, 2003
Fark had this post on the war that I have to agree with. "Let's face it: protestors might be damn hippies or whatever, but when they're right, let's be big enough to admit it."

It kind of indirectly touches on something I was think about the other day. For years, punks (apathetic malcontents) hated the hippies (know it all do-gooders.) But now comes the unavoidable realization: Punks are the new hippies! (Pippies? Hunks is already taken, and most punkers aren't.)

Are Yuppies the new punks?
posted by wil forbis 2/23/2003 03:34:36 PM

So last week I went to the blogging even that was being featured on the
main page. Last night, I checked out this
of a similar nature.

This one was a bit more interesting since it featured several bloggers I'd
heard of an read from time to time. Mickey Kaus who does the Kausfile blog (too
lazy to link) over at Slate was the most prominent. Ken
, who's linked to me before, was also present, as were about five other players.

The discussions were interesting, but I thought I'd focus on some of the annoying
personal habits of the panel. The aforementioned Layne does this thing where
he covers his mouth when he talks - either because he's scratching his nose,
caressing his beard or some similar act of fidgeting. It made me realize how
much talking is a visual form of communication - you need to see a person's
lips move too understand what they're saying. I guess lip reading isn't really
all that hard, and is even necessary to understand people. I'll bring that up
the next time some deaf person is whining about how miserable their life is.

This guy had a weird speech
pattern where he would start a sentence, then seemingly decide on a better way
to form the sentence, and start over from the beginning. But the new sentence
would seem like a duplicate of the previous sentence, and you were left thinking,
"Why didn't you just say it right the first time?" Like, he would

"I really think that bloggers most bloggers... I really think most bloggers
are right of center."

I guess it doesn't seem that annoying on the page, but he did this all night.

Anyway, after the discussion I ended up at some party in Venice Beach that
was right out of a rap video. Beautiful people wearing designers clothes yakking
at each other about hipster inanities. Obviously I fit right in.

The Tyson fight was playing at the party though.. Hard to believe that wasn't
fixed, but you gotta admire Tyson (if you overlook the fact that he's a date
rapist thug.) Every time it seems like he's finished, he surprises you. Hombre
can throw a punch.

posted by wil forbis 2/23/2003 03:23:56 PM

Another article related to my piece saying the left should get it's own media network. This guy says a left leaning radio station would fail, and he's probably right. But I do think that a left leaning cable network could succeed. My reasons? Gut instinct.

Course, one has to ask why Donahue on MSNBC is choking. I dunno...
posted by wil forbis 2/23/2003 02:17:46 PM

Friday, February 21, 2003
The Ice-Penis Cummeth
Andrew Sullivan made mention of an interesting story today - the dismantling of a giant penis ice sculpture at Harvard University. Turns out it was angry feminists who did it, and one of them went on the record, stating: Many women and men, including myself, are the victims of sexual assault, child sexual abuse and rape. The unwanted image of an erect penis is an implied threat; it means that we, as women, must be subject to erect penises whether we like it or not.

Andrew dissmisses it with a groan, but I see a setup for a great horror movie. Angry libbers destroy the erect penis ice scupture at a leading university. But in the ensuing days, they are found raped to death by what the coroner says "...could only be a giant ice-phallus with the ability to fly." The ice-penis is eventually warded off by a plucky astronomy student, and feminists everywhere state, "We have learned our lesson and will dutifully serve all men from now on."

Not bad eh? Title: Attack of the Ice Penis - The Unsafest Sex of All!
posted by wil forbis 2/21/2003 08:08:59 PM

Thursday, February 20, 2003
Before I say anything, I should announce that my old homie, T-Dawg, is now
part of this group: Betty-X. He's not on
any of the posted mp3s, but check 'em out anyway. And if you're in Seattle, check
out a show.

Nader and Iraq?
So anyway, I was thinking about this upcoming war...

And before I go any further I should state that I really think the only litmus
test about this is whether it can be shown that Iraq is threatening enough that
we should do battle. And I just don't see that. So it puts me in the uncomfortable
position of actually being on the same side as the hippies and other mortal
enemies of the Forbiscus Erectus. (And that "Erectus" don't refer to
the fact that we're walking, baby! You know what I'm talking about! Yeah!)

Anyway, I was watching TV today and I saw one of the protesters with a Ralph
Nader Pin. At this point, I should also add that while I didn't vote for Ralph,
I found him fairly likable and possessing a sense of humor that none of the
other candidates had. I defended him from accusations brought forth by many Gore supporters,
including my dad and his wife, who felt he stole the election from Al.
(I always liked Nader's rebuttal - "I thought Gore stole it from me.") But I was
watching this guy with a Nader pin protesting the war and I thought, "You know,
if Nader hadn't run in the 2000 election, we probably wouldn't be going to war
right now."

This is not to say, I blame Nader for the war with Iraq. And I'm not even
saying that I blame the people who voted for Nader for the war with Iraq. At
best, you could really only blame voters in obvious swing states (like Florida)
who voted for Nader. A lot of Nader votes were protest votes from people who
knew that Gore would get their states Electoral votes. (I, in fact, voted for
Harry Browne, but I did so confident Gore would take California.)

I, like a lot of people people in 2000, made the argument that there was little
difference between Gore and Bush. (Check out the second blog entry on this page.) I think our current situation makes the point
that I, like a lot of other people was totally fucking retarded. And in fact,
I have to concede the most painful of confessions: My dad was right.(He rarely
reads this, so it's cool.)

Of course I could argue that there's no way anyone could have seen 9/11 coming
during the 2000 election, which was the event that led us to where we were today.
Even Bush himself was fooling everybody (including himself, I believe) by campaigning
on a message of isolationism. But the truth is, you can never see things like
9/11 coming. On some level, when casting your vote, you have to take these things into account. Innocense doesn't mean you're not guilty. (Whoa... heavy.)

The plain and simple truth is, if Ralph Nader hadn't run for the Presidency we wouldn't
be going to war.

posted by wil forbis 2/20/2003 11:21:52 PM

Wednesday, February 19, 2003
Boy - I know I'm getting addicted to the Internet when I start thinking things like, "I gotta get offline and go watch some TV."
posted by wil forbis 2/19/2003 08:08:04 PM

Tuesday, February 18, 2003
One thing I keep forgetting to mention: This Saturday
I went to see this: Live
from the Blogosphere.
It was a sort of symposium on the current state of blogging.
I'm not sure it would really be defined as a symposium, but I don't get the chance
to use the word "symposium" enough.

Maybe "discussion group" would be a better description.

I went, because I noticed a statement on the main page advising
anyone who would be in LA that Saturday to check it out. I said, Hey, I live
in L.A. now. I should do this!

Oh, did I mention I moved to LA?

I was a little surprised at myself for going - I don't really find the world
of blogging that interesting. I've said in the past that a blog is really just
"a guestbook with wings." Actually, my original statement was that a blog is
just "Stay Free Maxis with wings," but someone pointed out that that didn't
make any sense.

As I was saying - I was hesitant to go as I feared it might simply be a bunch
of people sitting around talking about the mechanics of blogging. Sitting around
talking about blogging reminds me of kids in high school who sat around talking
about guitars as opposed to actually playing them. I myself, was a player, and
I'm sure beneath their snickers and jeers and throwing of stones they greatly
respected me.

But it was actually pretty interesting - more focused on the social aspects
and repercussions of blogs, than the mechanical side.

I thought the most entertaining of the panelists was this
- who everybody in the room but me seemed to be intimately acquainted
with. This chick was pretty funny
too. As seems well reported, the announcement came in that Google had bought
Blogger. But something else cool was the emergence of the audioblog - The premise
is that you'll dial up a phone number, leave a message at it will be posted
as an audio file to a web site. I suppose you could expand that idea by somehow
syndicating the audio blog and collect it with other audioblogs, which could
be combined into a cut and paste radio show of all your favorite audiobloggers.

Yep... just what the world needs.

posted by wil forbis 2/18/2003 10:49:19 PM

heh - glad to see tarryn's warming up the blog again. Here's a taste of her recent post and it only gets better from there. (By "better" I mean "more offensive.")

One thing you can say about the South Koreans - they can't count... how fucking hard is it to count some charred corpses? I seen 4 different news reports claiming a completely different total! Don't the police over there have a Counter-in-Chief or something?

posted by wil forbis 2/18/2003 09:19:14 PM

Monday, February 17, 2003
Well, I'll be damned. It turns out you people are actually looking at the archives (situated to your left.) I was just viewing at the hit report for the site and the archives are getting some noticeable traffic.

You know, if you want to search for past pebbles of wisdom you saw in this blog, you can use the acid logic search tool. It searches the whole acid logic site, including this blog. Please note that it will not find nuggets of wisdom, or specks of wisdom, only pebbles.

Holy Satan - I swear to God that when I wrote this piece arguing that left should stop whining and create their own media companies, I had not read this article saying the left plans to stop whining and create their own media companies. (In this case, a radio network.) They're even talking of using one of my suggested pundits, Al Franken. That said, their business plan seems a little weak, aiming at already underperforming radio stations. We'll see what happens. (Thanks to Saleeby for pointing this out.)

Speaking of Acid Logic, you people should buy some acid logic bumperstickers. They have funny sayings on them. Go look!

The will also ward of the ill effects of nuclear radiation when terrorists explode a dirty bomb in your neighborhood.
posted by wil forbis 2/17/2003 11:32:50 PM

Man - I had totally forgotten about the song playing on my cable music channel right now. "New Girl Now" by Honeymoon Suite. I haven't heard this song in more than a decade.
posted by wil forbis 2/17/2003 08:12:09 PM

Sunday, February 16, 2003
That "Waterfalls" song by TLC is pretty damn good.

posted by wil forbis 2/16/2003 02:27:32 AM

Saturday, February 15, 2003
You know, I was watching this Michael Jackson special that everybody's in an uproar about - the one where he says he gets in bed with his children. What really turned me off was what an avid consumer he is. There's a scene where he walks into some Vegas kitsch shop and starts buying everything in sight. C'mon man, there's people starving out there and you're getting a crystal chess set?

You wanna fuck little boys, that's fine. But don't be such a Grabby Gabriel.
posted by wil forbis 2/15/2003 12:58:01 PM

Thursday, February 13, 2003
Seems like the latest thing is this Joe Millionaire show. People are raising questions about the morality of a show based on the premise of a big lie: Joe really isn't a millioniare, he makes under 20,000 grand, and the chicks he's courting would drop him like he was... well, uh, me, if they knew the truth. Here's what I think would be an ideal ending for the show. Joe decides between the last two broads and then reveals the truth. They do whatever fruity yuppie chicks do - cry or something - and then he says, "Wait, there's more!" He pulls a zipper down the front of his face and reveals himself to be a reptilian alien. He say, "I am Zardor from planet Mongo, and I worked with the good people at Fox Broadcasting to construct this show to allow me to chose a human mate." The runner up whore would say something like "Why, I love planet Mongo in the summertime!" and he'd blast her with one of those finger lasers everyone on planet Mongo has. You know, they look kind of like a ruby with a skull face and have a trigger on the inside. Then he would announce that his race will soon demolish earth and he'd fly off into the sunset with whatever chick wins the show.

I think that would be a profound statement about truth and... stuff.
posted by wil forbis 2/13/2003 11:33:39 PM

Wednesday, February 12, 2003
By the way, you can hear some of the music I've been recording lately at this site My old friend Robert is using it to showcase some of our songs under the moniker "Armored Soul." That means we're baddasses.
posted by wil forbis 2/12/2003 10:29:29 PM

Here's an interesting quote from a Salon article about Iraq.

"For a second day, U.S. warplanes Wednesday bombed a surface-to-surface missile system in southern Iraq, while other planes dumped nearly half-million leaflets in anticipation of a possible war to overthrow Saddam Hussein."

A ha! We paper cut them to death! Fiendishly clever!

posted by wil forbis 2/12/2003 10:25:22 PM

Tuesday, February 11, 2003
Ha - Gotta give a jizz out to these guys:

What's a jizz out? It where you... oh, wait, my mom reads this.
posted by wil forbis 2/11/2003 03:18:21 PM

You know, I basically adhere to a philosophy that people should be able to do what they want as long as it doesn't harm others. Upon examination, it will follow that suicide is not "wrong" according to those rules. Granted you cause some mental consternation, but no physical aggravation to people around you. There is the question of inconvenience - somebody has to find your body, and pay to dispose of it. That's why I started musing of fair ways of committing suicide - methods that bypass these issues. As such I believe the fairest way to commit suidide is by JUMPING INTO A TANK OF PIRANHA AND LETTING THEM DEVOUR YOU! No mess, no shocking discovery of your body. So next time you're thinking of killing yourself, put down that shotgun, put away those sleeping pills.... and give piranhas a try.

Sorry if it's seems like I'm on a morbid track, but I saw FInal Destination II last night. If you liked the first one, as I did, you'll probably get a kick out of it. Otherwise, FOAD!
posted by wil forbis 2/11/2003 11:42:27 AM

Monday, February 10, 2003
Man, I just had a great pee. Better than sex, better than heroin racing through my veins.

Sometimes the simplest pleasures are best.
posted by wil forbis 2/10/2003 08:54:19 PM

Thursday, February 06, 2003
I was at the DVD section in Border's today and came across a movie called EEGAH. It was about this caveman who kidnaps some hot looking 60's chick from her boyfriend and then... stuff happens. The caveman was played by the guy who played "Jaws" in the James Bond flick.

It's a weird world. EEGAH... keep and eye out for it.
posted by wil forbis 2/6/2003 10:13:00 PM

Wednesday, February 05, 2003
Saw a FRIENDS rerun today. It was one of the "Fat Chandler" episodes.
posted by wil forbis 2/5/2003 07:06:14 PM

Tuesday, February 04, 2003
Holy shit! For the first time in my life, I HAVE CABLE TELEVISION!!!

Well, I guess that's not true really. About five years I lived with a couple of roomates who had cable.

But this is the first time I've actually paid for cable, where I can claim total rights to what's viewed on the television. If someone comes in and changes the channel, I can say, "Damn, bitch! Can't you see I'm watching that Nas video?"

Come to think of it, I used to do that back when I had roomates, so I guess that's not true either.

I was watching a bit of the Behind the Music on the Chilli Peppers today. I wasn't aware how big they were back when they had Hillel Slovik as their guitarist. (Actually, I should be, since I saw them right after he died in a pretty big warehouse show in Hawaii.) I've been thinking that it doesn't seem like there's any band of my generation that will be long term rockers, the way The Who or the Stones have been. Maybe the Chilli Peppers are it. They're one of the last that I ever would have picked, but they've got the commitment.
posted by wil forbis 2/4/2003 10:21:26 PM

Monday, February 03, 2003
Well, I'm wrapping up a move so blogging's been a bit delayed. I was amused by this sentence from a recent AP article.
"The United Nations must complete the disarmament of Iraq or become impotent, British Prime Minister Tony Blair said Monday."

You know, I think Blair's on to something here. Iraq obviously hasn't responded to threats of pre-emptive attacks, but what if we took away Saddam's manhood? Obviously Blair knows that the US has some special bomb that turns the once rock hard phalluses of our enemies to drooping, limp stalks of jello! Ha Ha... Now we are unstoppable!!!!

I'd suggest we use this bomb on the peace movement but they probably wouldn't notice a difference.

(Sorry Cody - But that joke was just begging to be told.)

I had a crazy dream last night about killing zombies. And I was woman.

posted by wil forbis 2/3/2003 10:05:15 AM

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Other Quality Crap:
***Armored Soul - You can check out some of my music here
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Four Color Hell
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* Yes, even I link to Salam Pax
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*Mike Daisey
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*Greg Kitten
*Creature of Comfort
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*Luke Ford, Enemy of Porn (And therefore my enemy)
*POV Online