The Kinks Schoolboys in Disgrace

"Schoolboys In Disgrace" by The Kinks

By John Saleeby
December 1st, 2019


The Kinks' "Schoolboys In Disgrace" is a definite Motherfucking Masterpiece. Wait a minute! Didn't we do a Motherfucking Masterpiece article about another Kinks Album a little while ago? Yeah, we did one about "State Of Confusion". What a Motherfucking Masterpiece! The Kinks have so many great Albums we could do a Motherfucking Masterpiece article one every month for a year! There's "State Of Confusion", "Schoolboys In Disgrace", "The Village Green Society", "Arthur", "Face To Face", "Low Budget", "Physical Graffitti", "Exile On Main Street", "Electric Ladyland", "Toys In The Attic", "Cat Scratch Fever, "Never Mind The Bollocks, Here's The Sex Pistols" . . . God, The Kinks are GREAT!

Yes, The Kinks - The Favorite Sixties British Rock Band of every Rock Fan who has gotten kinda bored with The Beatles and The Stones. I got bored with The Who so fast they don't even count! I mean, come on, "Who Are You?" is TERRIBLE! And that goofy Gypsy Fiddle thing at the end of "Teenage Wasteland"? And whoever called that Song "Baba O'Reilly"? It's "Teenage Wasteland"! And Keith Moon was just a creep. THERE! I said it! Bold And Unashamed! But they're better than The Dave Clark Five. I guess. But getting back to The Kinks, "State Of Confusion" is a great . . . Oh, I'm sorry, I got CONFUSED! Get it? Uh, Pete Townsend wrote that joke.

Yeah, there might be better British Bands than The Kinks but can you think of a better American one? Maybe 38 Special. Oh, "Sleepwalker" is a Kinks song? "Sleepwalker" isn't a 38 Special song? Well, that settles it - Ray Davies is The King! Uh oh! Here comes Dave Davies with some more of that crazy Sibling Rivalry stuff! In the USA everybody hates their Dad, in the UK everybody hates their Brother, and in The Shaggs everybody hates their Sister. Yeah, Shaggs jokes. It's actually come to that. Shaggs jokes.

"Schoolboys In Disgrace" is a Rock Opera but don't worry, Ken Russell is dead so you don't have to worry about someone making a terrible Movie out of it. That's another Who joke for all you knuckleheads who still think smashing up hotel rooms is cool. The Kinks were so classy that when they weren't onstage they were making sure that every hotel room had one of those little bottles of shampoo in the bathroom. Need some ice? Here comes Ray with a big bucket of frozen delight right now! Uh oh! Keith Moon knocked Ray off of the balcony! Fuck you, Keith!

"Schoolboys In Disgrace" is about a Schoolboy in disgrace but fortunately he is not a deaf, dumb, and blind Schoolboy so you can listen to the album without even knowing that it is a Rock Opera. Yeah, some of the songs come back sounding just a little different than before but it's better than a Metallica album where all the songs sound alike until you find out it was Megadeth the whole time and even "Tommy" sounds like a good idea. My God, "Rock Opera"! Who's idea was that? Fuck you, Keith!

We all know that Ray and Dave Davies have always hated each other's guts (Ma Davies tried going on the road with them to keep the peace but she was too busy with all those little bottles of shampoo and Ma Moon knocked her off of the balcony. Fuck you, Ma . . . No, that wouldn't be nice) but "Schoolboys In Disgrace" is the rare Kinks album where Dave's guitar playing damn near steals the whole show! Yo, Slash! Get a load of Dave Davies on this album! Looking for another old British Rock Star to hang around with now that Lemmy has gone off to that Great Strip Club VIP Room In The Sky? Dave could teach you a thing or two about Rock N' Roll without you having to listen to him talk about the First World War all the time. Although being in the same band as your brother is probably as terrible as being in the First World War. I should probably make a Gallagher Brothers joke here but I'm the only guy in America who still likes Oasis so KISS MY ASS, EVERYBODY!!! KISS MY ASS!!! "You're a very angry person" Fuck you, Keith!

But the very best thing about "Schoolboys In Disgrace" is my Favorite Kinks Song Off All Time - "No More Looking Back". Come on, everybody! Let's SING! No more looking back, no more living in the past, yesterday's gone, that's a fact, now there's no more . . . Hey, get that Steve Perry guy outta here! He's making me sound bad! Yeah, "No More Looking Back" is every bit as wonderful as any of the more familiar Kinks tunes like "Lola", "You Really Got Me", "All Of The Day And All Of The Night", "Waterloo Sunset", "Tired Of Waiting For You", "Stairway To Heaven", "Two Tickets To Paradise", "Summer Of Sixty Nine", "Jeepers Creepers Where'd You Get Those Peepers?'", "Love In An Elevator", "We're An American Band" . . . God, The Kinks are GREAT!

So God Bless The Kinks --- Ray Davies, Dave Davies, Mick Ivory, John Dalton, Pete Quaife, Joe Strummer, Dennis Wilson, Bun E Carlos, Peter Criss, Bill Berry, Brad Delp. . . God, The Kinks are GREAT!

John Saleeby wrote for The National Lampoon while he was in high school, was a stand up comic in New York, and has contributed to the net humor zines, Campaign Central, and the legendary American Jerk. He's on medication now so he's probably a little nicer now than he was when you met him earlier. Email -

Dude, partake of some other Motherfucking Masterpieces!

Iggy Pop's "Party" by John Saleeby
With the arrival of the 80's, Iggy Pop turned to one man to resurrect his career: Ivan Kral!
Heavy Metal by Wil Forbis
This animated film from the 80's had more naked alien chicks than you could shake a phallicized laser pistol at.
Scanners by Johnny Apocalypse
Was Scanners a parable about out of control corporations or just an excuse to show exploding heads?
Repo Man by Wil Forbis
Packed with dead aliens, punk rock angst and Harry Dean Stanton in the role of his career, Alex Cox's cinematic masterpiece defined the term "cult film."
RoboCop by John Saleeby
Peter Weller shines as the clanking crimefighter in need of axel grease.
Falling Down by Wil Forbis
The final defense of the angry white male.
Office Space by Wil Forbis
Mike Judge, creator of Beavis and Butthead, satirizes the modern deskjob.
Mr. Bungle by Wil Forbis
The maniacal album that inspired tens, even dozens of musicians to become agro/metal/funk fanatics. Remember the clowns!
Body Count by Cody Wayne
Ice-T's hardcore metal group, famous for their ode to cop killin', get their due.
John Carpenter's "The Thing" by Cody Wayne
John Carpenter redefined the horror genre with his study of arctic isolation and shape shifting aliens.

And here's more!



Columns - Features - Interviews - Fiction - Acid Radio - GuestBook Sign/View - Blogs
View for more sin and wackiness!

Email Publisher